I have been reading On Killing by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, and it has me thinking about the reality of the martial arts. War is war, and defeating the enemy is just another word for killing them. Lt. Col. Grossman puts a lot of emphasis on the distance factor (it being a lot easier to kill with bomber than a knife) and it came to me that a lot of Ninjutsu is about killing at VERY close range.
Lets face facts. Ninjutsu is not a movement study. It is about completing an objective, no matter what the odds. If you are training any other way, you might want to ask yourself why you are into Ninjutsu and not Aikido or tai-chi if you like the movement, or judo or karate if you like competition aspect. Nonetheless I have to wonder how many of us could stab an adversary with a knife if the situation warranted. Many of my friends in the club are military and police - they are studying to improve their chances of survival. They might have to complete that thrust we all learn in tantojutsu.
Could you? I don't know if I could.
The psychological aspects of Ninjutsu are shrouded in a combination of the general fear of discussion of Ninjutsu and the "you'll learn that later' part of the art. Fact is, I think a decent psychoanalyst could have a field day with most of us, starting with Hatsumi himself. Studying a combat martial art in this day and age, when you aren't actually planning on any combat is, well, strange.
So why do we? Preparation? Are we getting ready for when martial law is declared? Is it really just self defense? I have no idea. But I have a sneaking suspicion that 1) there is a lot to learn form this art without being consumed with the concept of death and 2) not many of us are gonna find out and that is a good thing.
Read On Killing. It will get you thinking.